do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
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