We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
