Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
