Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
What happened to fro yo and sex?
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
