She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Randomize
