i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize