I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Come see our sink grown plant.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
