I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
