let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
