I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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