And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
We got so high we made milksteak
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Randomize
