so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
