Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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