dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Randomize
