Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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