So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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