Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
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got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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