there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Randomize
