She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Randomize
