yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
