I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
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