shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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