thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
