OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize
