Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize