Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize