we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Randomize
