I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I love you. Go after that dick
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
