I'm lost and stupid without you.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
