Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
