Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
