I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
