did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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