you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
