After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Randomize