can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
