Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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