I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
