I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Randomize
