i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
