So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
