i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Dick very happy bro
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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