Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize