just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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