yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
