remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize