people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize