There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Randomize
