Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
