He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
